Do not marry someone to please someone else

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Sohoub Baghdadi

While many Saudi students are preparing for the journey of their lives to travel overseas to attend a foreign university, a large number of them associate going abroad with marriage!

It is seems to be a cliché nowadays to hear that a mother is investigating every possible option in search of an “express” wife for her ambitious son. It is true that mothers also try to find husbands for their daughters prior to their trip abroad as well, but I will deal with that in a future article.

A friend of mine struggled a lot because of his mother’s constant demand for him to pick a girl from the long list she had compiled prior to his trip to the US. He tried hard to explain his position and thoughts about marriage at that important stage in his life. Eventually, his parents gave up after deciding that there was no hope of changing his mind.

My friend graduated with an honor’s degree, got a position at a respected university and he is currently back in the Kingdom looking for the right girl.

A person should not marry someone to please someone else and to put them at their ease. Doing so is rash and will only result in the husband and wife sacrificing their happiness and stability in life including that of their future children.

When marrying someone make extra sure that the person you are going to spend more time with than the time you have spent with your beloved parents is worthy. Also be sure to keep in mind that the chosen one has a life of his/her own to live and fulfill. Every step forward you make in your life must not be associated with the concept: “In order for me to do this, I should first do that.” Things do not normally work that way. So why not skip the distress in the first place?

Getting a degree is an accomplishment. So, focus on what matters to you in terms of achieving your goals and dreams. Furthermore, do not mix some things up with other things and end up messing everything up along the way. To sum up, choose wisely and live for yourself fully.

Sohoub Baghdadi,

Jeddah


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